SIGNS OF MY IMMINENT DEMISE

September 3, 2010

SIGNS OF MY IMMINENT DEMISE

1. Last night I went to bed at 9 and woke for the day at 2:14 a.m.

2. I repeatedly wear clothes with built-in stains and missing buttons, assuming I can fool people each time just by uttering “What the heck?! When did THAT happen?”

3. I’m excited to buy windows for our house.

4. I’d rather lay on the couch than go out on a Friday night. And a Saturday night. And a Sunday night. And a . . . .

5. I say words like “skeedaddle” and “dadblasted” and “fiddlesticks” on a regular basis.

6. I spend more time plucking than shaving.

7. I care more about keggling than keggers.

8. I choose shoes for their support not their style.

9. I don’t really get the new “bromance” genre of movies. Too much cussing and nudity.

10. Compound interest gets me hot.