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Thursday, July 17, 2014

Stay Calm and Be Happy

Travel is a sandwich made up of Remembering and Forgetting, held together with a thick swipe of Stuff I Did Not Know tucked in between.  It takes time and care to make such a sandwich, but it is always time well spent.

Typically, I start with  "Remembering," which is a hearty, whole-grain slice of research I whip up long before I leave home.  This slice serves two important purposes.  First, it lights my fire, jazzing me up for the trip ahead.  Second, it provides context for what it is that I'm about to experience, which will (fingers crossed) help encourage a few synapses to fire while I'm away.

The remains of the sandwich can be prepared on the road, although some people can't help themselves and give in to the urges of "Forgetting" long before they pull out of the drive.  These urges typically lead to the act of buying underwear or toothpaste in another state or country, which really isn't the worst thing on earth, if you think about it.

For me, though, that slice of "Forgetting" doesn't manifest itself in what I leave out of my luggage.  Rather, for me, forgetting is the conscious act of ignoring what is in my rear-view mirror--all those people and pets that I love, the joy of reading the paper on the back patio, the finally-decent mattress we just purchased--so that I can enjoy what is yet to come.  It is, for me, the most challenging part of the sandwich, the part I sometimes struggle to swallow.

As for all that Stuff I Did Not Know?  That part of the sandwich is always prepared on the road and on the fly,  and it is where a person will find the real meat of a vacation.

Below is some of that Stuff I Did Not Know that made my trip to England and Scotland a terrific one.

1.  The People in Britain are Really Nice
It's not that I thought they wouldn't be friendly, but, honestly, I had no idea that the British people would be as memorable as their history and their architecture.  Take Leo and Jane from Suffolk.  They let us invade their table at an outdoor pub even though it was the 4th of July and everyone back home was blowing up their old Barbie Dolls in honor of our independence from Britain.

Then, there was our London cabbie, a fascinating fellow who told us never to get another cab in London because we could walk around that city just fine on our own. 

There were other fine folks, too--like Briney and Paul, two pub patrons who let us sit with them and then spent most of the evening talking with us, swapping sips of drinks and generally acting like we were fun to hang with.

And I thoroughly enjoyed meeting Emily, a hiker I met along Hadrian's Wall out in the beautiful nowhere.  She was walking the width of England and asked if she could take my photo.  Apparently, she's doing paintings of people she meets.  Either that, or I met a major creeper. . .

. . . And then, on our last day--on the airplane of all places!--there was Linda, our flight attendant from heaven.  After moving Mark and me to more comfortable seating, she caught wind of our 25th anniversary, which was the day before our flight.  Soon, glasses of champagne, a package of United napkins, an entire bottle of champagne and little United "flight" wing pins were raining upon us.  I felt like I'd won the lottery.

2.  Bacon is not bacon is not bacon
Apparently, in the UK, "bacon" means "long slices of Canadian Bacon," or "ham," depending on your perspective.  It was one of the few disappointments of the trip. 

3.  Not All Hand Dryers are Made the Same
First, I learned that almost no bathrooms in Britain have paper towels.  Rather, they have those really loud air dryers--like leaf blowers mounted on a wall.  Most of them run for about 2 seconds, long enough to spatter the water on your pants.  Ah, but then, there is the Dyson Hand Dryer, the Mercedes of dryers...sleek, fast and effective.   I get goosebumps just remembering them.

Speaking of Mercedes. . . .

4.  They'll Give a Mercedes to Anyone
We picked up our rental car in Bath.  While I never mustered up enough courage to drive in Britain,  I did at least ride in style. Why?  Because the Alamo clerk said it was a slow day that day so she gave us a Mercedes.  When I have a slow day, I assign more homework or nap during my plan period.

5.  There is No Separation of Church and State in Britain
Every church we visited (and we visited a lot) included memorials honoring Britain's armed forces.  It was rather stunning to see the patriotism and appreciation, something I've not really noticed in American churches.  And it was very moving.  I was haunted by one, in particular, in Edinburgh's St. Giles Cathedral, erected for a son who died in war, given by his "proud and afflicted father.  My son was gentle, kind and died a hero."  We in this country would do well to do better at this.

6.  Haggis and Whiskey Will Not Kill Me
I knew I'd face both on this trip--we were going with our "Just Say Yes" friends, Barry and Jeanne, after all.  I did not know if I would survive either.  And yet, I did.  Barely.

7.  Greenland is Stunning
I don't know why I looked out the airplane window when I did, but I do know that I could barely turn my head away after that.  There before me was a stunning, mountainous landscape dotted with glacial slides and turquoise lakes.  It was amazing.


8.  Beer is Not Bound by the Clock
I suppose I knew this one was true on paper, but hadn't previously lived it out like I did during this vacation.  Brits, it turns out, like their pubs and their beer and are not averse to having a pint at lunch on a weekday.  Or after lunch.  Or after dinner.

Alas, through all of those lessons, I did my best to learn them well.  But I'm still only human at the end of the day.

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